Archive for September 15, 2012

For those who don’t know Rosh Hoshanah is the Jewish New Years. The Jewish people have their own calendar which is much older than the romo-greco calendar we use in society today. Therefore, we get together and celebrate Rosh Hoshanah with our family’s and our friends and often go to synagogue, which is the Jewish church or mosque.

  The typical Rosh Hoshanah dinner is multiple courses starting with matzo ball soup and apples dipped in honey. After that we usually have a main course consisting of salad chicken and potatoes. After this we get dessert which is a rare treat for us. My mom now usually makes pears soaked in wine because she thinks “it’s light and healthy, so it’s good after a big supper.” However,  back in the day when a family who my family is really close with still lived in Winnipeg their mom made this unbelievable strawberry cake.  



This one particular year, after supper all the children decided that we were going to go to 7-11 and get slurpees.

So the next day in, my class on judaic law, everyone was discussing what they did for Rosh Hoshanah like they seder’s that they went to. They all had these hugely elaborate seder’s since most Jews in Winnipeg are related, unlike my family, therefore they have lots of family in town. Therefore, when it was my turn to share I talked about how we had a tiny seder (a word for a dinner in hebrew. Hebrew the language Jewish people speak.) and how I had gone for a blue slurpee. Everyone thought this was hilarious because blue slurpees are extremely unkosher (kosher word for some Jews special diet where they are dictated what they can and cannot eat. Simple rules like no milk and meat, cows and chicken are supposed to be killed in a certain way that is more humane to the animals and no eating pigs because they are extremely dirty animals).  Most Jews do not keep Kosher.  What makes a blue slurpee unkosher is how they get the blue colouring. The blue colouring is made or at one point it was made before everything is now artificially made in labs, it is made out of beaver tails.  Peoplthey thought the idea of going for blue slurpees on Rosh Hoshanah which is an important day for Jewish people was hilarious. Partly because it was so completely different from what everyone was sharing and talking about since they had all gone to these really really big family seders. 

Why am I sharing this story now and what is the relevance to anything? First off because I want to, and secondly, no relevance to absolutely anything, however, in your blog you can write about what you want to write about and I will write about anything I want to write about the end. If any insight can be gleaned from this story it is how I have always marched to the beat of my own drum.

All the dating advice for people with Aspergers is actually limited, therefore I need to find some real help.

Here are some dating tips you may find.

Make sure to shower daily and wash your hair. (check)

Make sure you wear fresh clothes everyday. (check)

Don’t only talk about your interest areas. Take interest in her interest and ask lots of questions. (Check)

If she says no respect her wishes and don’t sulk about it. (Check)

Be yourself. (check)

If you go to a movie pay, or if she insists on paying pay for chocolate mints or something 

I have succeeded in following every single step in the guide and therefore, should feel really proud of myself right? Wrong, because I don’t feel any better about myself because I am still no close to getting a girlfriend.   I mean I could turn to pick-up artist tricks, which might help such as StyleLife. The only problem is that they get you to do ridiculous challenges teaching you the skills you need. Challenges that I definitely feel uncomfortable trying to complete such as phoning complete strangers and getting three movie reccommendations. Having Aspergers and already being self-conscious about myself I found this task impossible. I tried calling one person and they hung up right away and I never tried again. Thinking, okay, okay maybe you can do the next challenge working up to the skills you need to get a girl interested in me because nothing I had done before had worked in the past so maybe I need to step out of my comfort zone. I’ll just come back to the phoning challenge. Well at the same time being part of this “class” was costing me 100 dollars a month so I skipped ahead. The next challenge was something easy and I forget what it was but the next challenge was insane. Are you ready? The next mission was to go out begging for money until you got enough bus fare for the bus. Isn’t that insane? How many people out there would actually feel up to this task? This is not a rhetorical question I am actually curious. So realizing that skipping ahead would not be of any use because the tasks only get harder and harder and I can’t step out of my comfort zone as far as that I decided to save my money and quit the “class”.

    Which leaves me needing some serious advice on how to talk to a girl and get one to go on a date with me. I mean there was even a really skanky girl at the karaoke bar I went to last night. A friend of a boyfriend of a friend of a friend kind situation, you know it is. So I figured I would at least get a make-out session but I couldn’t even pull that off. Which 99.5% of other men who had any inclination to pull it off could have. I still had a good time and enjoyed good company not wanting to fall into the category of annoying people I mentioned in my previous blog who only go out looking for sex but it was still bloody annoying.

Therefore if you have any real dating advice or want to take me under your wing like in the movie “Hitch” starring Will Smith please do.