Aspergers on the final countdown

Posted: December 11, 2012 in advocacy, aspergers, entertainment
Tags: , , ,

1 Day until the lottery. That’s one sleep, one and half shifts of work (tomorrow’s and this one) and then I will know whether I get to be in the Fringe Festival this upcoming year.

There are so many fears running through my head. What if my number doesn’t get picked? I already had one bad dream about this. What if it was really an omen? While then it means I will have to wait another year before I can do a show about Aspergers. Why is it so important that I do the show? It will raise awareness, challenge perceptions people have, of people with Aspergers. Maybe seeing the show it will make people view Aspergers and the people with it differently. Hopefully, it will raise my status in the comedy community and people will start booking me more for gigs for people with disabilities. Hopefully it will mean more people will start reading my blog and that will raise the status of the cause as well as my own status as a performer.

What if, however, having watched my show, people are not more conscious and people walk out still indifferent or negative thinking about Aspergers. Will my show have been a failure? Is it too much to expect that one show can make a huge difference? I mean attitudes take a long time to set in and once someone has made up their minds it is hard to change them. Can I really consider my show a success, however? Won’t it be the exact same as all the other shows out there that just entertain? If so, why is it so important to me to do a show? I mean, yes, I imagine it will be fun, but it will also be lots of hard-work and anxiety about whether or not people enjoyed it. Also whether or not people will come to the show and whether or not I will make back my original investment of $700 dollars. There is many other ways I could spend that money, which may give me as much joy.

I could also go on a week-long vacation for the same amount of money which would extremely relaxing.

For $700, I could buy myself a video game and use the rest of the money to invest.

If I was really so concerned with making a big difference, I could donate the money.

I could buy families who need them 14 chickens and 7 goats which would provide support for a family for a long time. These gifts would also be self-sustainable for a whole village.

I could buy 100 ducks.

10 shares of a dairy cow.

2 oxens and a plow, and a pig. 

Send 10 orphans to school for a year.

(courtesy worldvision.org)

A round-ticket to New York City $702 (according to Google).

Or even pay rent for one month, if I moved out of my parents place and found somewhere to go.

Instead I am spending it on a show, which it is possible no one will attend. It is unlikely, since I have paired up with the popular, Chantal Marostica, but it is possible.

In addition, since I have not mentioned it anywhere else, I have always wanted to be in the Fringe after seeing other successful shows and hoping one day it could be me.

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Comments
  1. grndmachris says:

    You have fantastic blogs and they are always wonderful to read. As far as the $700, I wish I could ease your mind. 🙂 Keep up the great work of teaching the public.

  2. Life&Ink says:

    I hope you received good news today. You will make a difference, you will, because you want to and when you want to and you keep at it, it will happen. You are brave and putting yourself out there and if I have learned anything in my 47 years it is if you keep at it, it will work out and it will pay off and you will be far richer emotionally and quite possibly financially for following your dreams and working to make them happen. Let us know how it goes because we care. 🙂

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