The littlest things that set us off

Posted: April 12, 2013 in aspergers
Tags: , , ,

Yesterday, I was at a workshop, called Building a Rapport with the Public, which is a very important part of my job, really of any job. This course and courses like it go along way in trying to answer the age-old question “Can’t we all just get along?”
As part of the course we did several group activities as well as lots of introspection as we tried to figure out ways that we can get together with the general public. The people in the class came from a wide-range of city employment such as police services, paramedics as well as 311. The group was great and we had alot to share and learn from one-another and discussed things such as attentive listening. Which is when you not only listen with your ears but listen with your mind. We also discussed the qualities of an assertive person first as small groups and then with the whole group. During the large group segment, we were coming up with the qualities of an assertive person such as straight-forward, confident charismatic. Charismatic?? What?? When a person suggested this quality and when the instructor put it down I was like No, No, No. It made me so upset that I wanted to stop my feet, I wanted to take the marker out of the instructors hands and cross it out myself. Instead, I settled with raising my hand and pointing out that both aggressive and passive people can also be charismatic, because charismatic simply means likable, therefore, did not relate to the conversation. They may as well have said; that an assertive person is happy, tall and skinny.
What is interesting, however, is that I could not let the point go. I could not smile and simply go along but had to point out the mistake and argue with the instructor until she saw my point of view and finally put a question mark next to it, even though this was not enough in my head and I wanted it simply crossed out. This little point bugged me for the next 45 minutes until the workshop was over. It’s amazing the little things that set our minds off. The things that we can’t live with. I mean I have been insulted to my face and shrugged it off, I have been kept waiting a really long time and while this annoyed me it did not set me off nearly as much as the fact that this characteristic which was so wrong was staying on the list.

  1. madebymeghan says:

    I would disagree that charismatic simply means ‘likeable’. It is actually a very rare quality, IMO. “charismatic: exercising a compelling charm that inspires devotion in others.” And I would disagree that a wholly passive person is or can be ‘charismatic’. Note the use of the word ‘exercising’ in the definition I’ve quoted above, indicating, to me, that one is active not passive when charismatic.

    I understand this is not really to point of your post, but perhaps you wouldn’t have gotten so stuck on it if … well, if you understood the word to mean what I think it means – LOL!

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