blogging about Aspergers

It is interesting, that the best blogs that I have found so far on the topic of Aspergers, have all been written by a mother of someone with Aspergers. For some reason, they have much a clearer perspective about what is going on with us and the challenges we face and are much more eloquent when talking about them than most of us could do ourselves. Is it because our mothers love us more than we could ever love ourselves and they see our strengths and weaknesses much more clearly, while, we only focus on our temporary setbacks and can’t see the trees for the forest?
Or is there another factor at play? There is the fact, that they are, by definition much older. In addition, they have experienced their own childhood so they have something to compare ours too. They see what seems to be serious challenges because they are different from those in, their own childhood which often enough does not include Aspergers. Do not get me wrong, there are many mothers who have blogs which are well-written and also have Aspergers; but, the ones I follow the closest such as the brilliant blog written by Alice Hendley do not. Therefore, they know what it is like to go on dates and how most of the outside world thinks and are able to compare that to their children’s experiences with Aspergers.
The answer could be the result of a countless number of other factors such as to name a few one, most of the blogs by parents are by mothers and maybe women are simply better writers. I reject, this hypotheses out of hand but there could be truth to it. To name another reason, it could be that people with Aspergers don’t want to let our disability define us as much as it truly does. Therefore, I may choose to associate myself as a comedian with Aspergers. Being a parent of a child with Aspergers is much more of a choice if you are liberal and are on the left with your politics. Parents have choices such as abortion or adoption, therefore, they have more choice over their identity than someone simply born one way or another.

Aspergers on what is the length of true love

True love is wonderful as a concept, as is love at first sight and the idea of soulmates. People with Aspergers often are a cynical bunch having struggled with romantic interactions which falls under social interactions in general. Okay maybe, its not fair to put that on all people with Aspergers so I will correct that previous sentence and say I am a cynical person. Yet at the same time, I often hold out the hope of a soulmate of at least one person who will understand and love me for being myself. And god knows there is probably only one person who can love me for that. 

Which raises the question how do you know when is the right time to pop the question? Avril Lavigne and Chad Kruegger would say after six weeks but for most people this is absolutely crazy. Chad Kruegger is a very special case, because most people hate his band Nickel Back and Avril Lavigne’s best years as an artist are behind her. Therefore, maybe what brought them so close so quickly is an us against the rest of the world mentality. Anyone in this state of being can feel emotions much deeper and quicker, which may subside over time. 

Most couples would ask more questions like how do you know how well you guys will get along, if you haven’t even had your first fight yet? Maybe that person that you thought was an angel turns into a hell beast with sharp yellow claws and enormous fangs after they have been hurt. Maybe they go out and cheat with the first person they see. Maybe they get really hurtful and act really mean. It’s impossible to accurately predict how the other person will act until you two have been in a relationship longer. You also don’t know if after being in a relationship a person will become a real slob who goes everywhere in dirty sweatpants and picks up 50 pounds. You don’t know how well you will get along with the in-laws. What if his mother is the mother-in-law from hell and he always takes her side. Then they are clearly not marriage material.

  On the other hand celebrity marriages also end really quickly for examples see the Kardashians or Britney Spears, Dennis Rodman and Carmen Electra the list goes on and on. Maybe when your whole life is lived in front of the camera even the most intimate things such as weddings become publicity stunts. I am just curious when they are going to go into celebrity funerals and suicides so they can go out on top instead of being forgotten like Courtney Love or Drew Barrymore. Maybe they already have. Another factor is the majority of celebrities live life much faster and have a short-life span as A-list celebrities before they disappear and are forgotten. In this time, they have to get married and have children. Maybe for these celebrities a wedding that lasts 48 hours is the equivalent to a marriage that lasts 6 months. Sure that’s a short period, some could call it a mistake but they continue to grow and learn what they want in a partner.

How long is eternity in a relationship like this, while the best estimate is seven years that’s how long Amy Poehler and Will Arnett lasted and they were perfect for each other. Nevertheless, these break-ups continue to have a larger

Maybe in this fast changing age marriages for fifty odd years is a thing of the past. Marriage and staying together is no longer an evolutionary survival necessity. If marriage is such a light undertaking why is it still denied to so many. Oh well, gay marriage is an issue that will have to wait for another post. Maybe people change more than they used to because they are constantly bombarded with more options than in the past. I thought marrying young had gone by the wayside as my brother got married when he was almost 30 and my sister got married in her 30’s. But I have been suprised time and time again by young people who get married. This is smart because it makes it easier to get remarried after the first divorce, who really wants to look for marriage number two when you are both 45 or older?

Back in the 50s it was easier to be married for life because life was slower and people died younger. Not the case anymore, so how long does true love last these days? Does a person really have multiple soulmates because the idea that there is only one person for each person when there are millions and billions of people alive is quite daunting. Maybe only one soulmate you’ll ever meet and hundreds you never will.